Pirate Rants

There were too many freshmen downtown last weekend.

It's funny how students who insult freshmen, seem to forget that they were once freshmen themselves too, and not too long ago.

Not eating has been so much easier than I thought it would be.

With this new opinion editor, all there's going to be are feminist rants and man-bashing.

I think that any man that gets hammered and decides to brawl with a girl should be castrated.

If you're wondering where all the decent guys are, they're waiting for you to raise your standards. Either that or I just found the last one. Sorry y'all.

I think it's really sad that everyone excuses your behavior with the same reason, "She's just a &*@$#." What a great personality you have.

It's just so funny to me that you don't realize just how hated you are.

I wonder if I am the "hot blonde" woman that works at Parking & Transportation.

At the end of last year I promised myself that I'd stop sleeping around with the girls in my dorm. Five minutes after moving in, I realized that there is no way in heck that I'm going to be keeping that promise.

People who go to the OP: Spilling your alcohol means you've obviously had too many... GO HOME!

There are a lot of anti-Obama and pro-McCain rants that make it. I mean, McCain is 72 and he has admitted he can't work a computer! I mean, come on people! Do we really want someone like that as our president in the 21st century?

G-Vegas? Simple, we're so awesome yet so egotistical and whatever happens in G-Vegas lands on the front page of the newspaper.

Hey girl, what's yo faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaacebook?

Is it wrong to plot the demise of the Financial Aid Office?

I'm very disappointed that ECU allowed trash like Greg Giraldo to do a show here-- humiliating students and degrading those with disabilities. That's not the kind of welcome that W.O.W. is about.

Come on ECU! Greg Giraldo is a pretty big professional comedian. Good job bringing him in. Too bad Minges is the worst possible venue to have a comedy show in. Show fell flat because of the bad venue choice.

Driving through Greenville is like driving through an endless maze of potholes, manholes and other things that will maul your vehicle.

I can drive my car with no steering wheel. No steering wheel.

To the Alpha Phi girl whom I've known since elementary school: Sweetie, it's OK to say "hello" to me when you see me on campus, even if I'm not an Alpha Phi.

Why can't there be more sorority girls like my BFF, who is an Alpha Phi. She's so sweet to like everybody!

I wish the engineering department were more organized. You jerks made me miss several meetings because no one could agree on the same time to meet! And you thought engineers were good with numbers, ha!

Don't assume that the girl taking your order at Burger World is a high school drop out, a teen mom with no baby daddy or that she cant afford college. She's in med school and she's going to be your OB-GYN one day.

Philosophical rants are stupid... please go look up "rant" and alter your submissions appropriately.

Thank God for PIRATE RANTS!!

The world is a whole lot less funny without Bernie Mac.

My best friend has become the people we used to make fun of in middle school.

I feel like I'm missing out on something by not living on campus. Am I?

I love the Olympics.

Guess what ladies: tattoos are not pretty. You look like a tramp.

I'm just curious but is it normal for ECU buses to kick handicapped people off the bus while non-handicapped students take up the handicapped seats and the bus driver ignores this? It was a little creepy to watch this happen.

I love getting on the bus at NCC in the morning, only to realize that all the freshman have taken the seats and I have to risk my life standing up.

If everything I touched turned into skittles I wouldn't have to worry about getting condoms.

It makes me sick how often I hear about students who give away their pets because they "can no longer take care of them." Don't get them in the first place! Or, learn to make your animal a priority--it's a living creature! Don't move to an apartment that doesn't allow pets, for example! If your boyfriend is allergic, get some Claritin! People need to grow up, have a heart and be responsible for their animals, period.

I am going to strategically wet the bed so my annoying roommate will move out!

How come my drawings of us together under your door don't seem to impress you? JUST LOVE ME!

Because one stupid girl who couldn't swim, went swimming when she knew she couldn't, every ECU student has to pass a stupid swim test!? You can go through life very successfully without knowing how to swim! Just don't be stupid and get in the water anyway!

Why will I ever need to know about clam growth? I want to work in fashion!

It is now 3:13 p.m. as I write this. I got my number at roughly 9 a.m. Financial Aid has longer waiting than... well... something else that has a long wait!

I definitely got a drunk dial from my father yesterday... how weird is that?

Dear summer, I know you gon' miss me... because I am going to miss you.

Take yourself and your little un-house trained puppy AND LEAVE! Just because you date my roommate does not mean you live here too!

How does my dog fart louder than I do?

I'm gonna put some furl in your curl, Earl.

My chemistry professor is so buff, he has to be on steroids or something, right? Science geeks are never this muscular!

If you zoom in on Wright Circle on Google Maps, you can still see the fountain!

I definitely saw a ninja walking down First Street tonight...

I met the North Campus Crossing ninja last night… and I am sworn to secrecy, but he does exist!

It looks like all the jerks have made their annual "move to the newest apartment complex." The Bellamy gets to deal with them now. I'm sure The Exchange and North Campus Crossing will be somewhat relieved to be rid of them.

I'd like to thank Financial Aid for supporting my drug habit. How would I survive without my refund?!

People who don't get your laundry out, whether for the washer or dryer... I am going to start removing it for you, because I shouldn't have to waste my time waiting for your sorry butt to come back to just get your ball cap or boxers. P.S. You're welcome and start getting your crap out on time.

Make conversation already! We have been roommates for four weeks now... at least say hi when I return.

I transferred out of ECU to Appalachian because I hated the people Greenville attracted. Now that I'm gone, I miss all my best friends.

I'd date Predator if he was in a good mood.

An apple a day keeps Spencer away.

If everything I touched turned into skittles I wouldn't have to worry about getting condoms

Please, no more home games in Charlotte. Last I checked, ECU is in Greenville, NC not Charlotte. Last year, we WENT to VA Tech in Blacksburg. Who scheduled the game halfway across the state from Greenville? I would have gone, but my tickets were in the nosebleed section--I watched on TV anyway.

Am I the only one who thinks Greenville smells like wet dog when it rains?

How many times do I have to get burned before I'll stop playing with fire?

I'm reading Pirate Rants from Tübingen Germany!

If you really want to date the guy, you should prolly stop telling him about your panic attacks and psycho ex-boyfriend. . . . Just a thought.

What do you call a cow that just had her baby? deCALFfeinated HAHAHAHA

HEEEEYYYYYYY YYYOOOOUUUUU GUYS