Spring Break
Ms. Communal Mattress
Vivian Stockton
Issue date: 9/17/09 Section: Opinion
In almost every group of friends, there is "that girl" -- the one who seems to find herself in a different guy's bed each night.
It's almost like she stalks the group looking for her next victim, because she has grown bored with the other five guys she has already sampled.
She's not hard to find either. More than likely she is flirting relentlessly with anything that has a penis or she is doing her best to keep the spotlight on her -- perhaps she feels the need to show all the gentlemen that she has amazing pole dancing skills.
Outwardly it appears that she is well-loved by every man in the group, and understandably so! They know that based on her previous performances, she will be pleasing the peen of one of the group members before the night is out.
And in her mind, she is the perfect guy's girl. She likes to have sex with no strings attached and she couldn't possibly be doing anything wrong because she knows all the guys she hooks up with.
But the sad truth is, she is lying to herself.
She neglects to see that no one takes her seriously and, worse yet, no one respects her.
Regardless of whether they want to admit it, guys gossip -- and sometimes they are worse than females, especially if the topic at hand is who's doing whom. So it goes without saying that if she slept with Tommy last weekend and Dan the next, the two will compare notes. And there is a good chance that those notes will be shared with the other men in their circle. This automatically causes the rest of the group to either become interested in sleeping with her or adding her to their not-to-do list for one simple reason -- she has been labeled as a communal mattress.
Not only does she lose the respect of the men, but the ladies aren't too fond of her either.
To females, a woman with a free vagina is a threat. She makes things harder for those of us who aren't trying to make a public mockery of ourselves and miss out on snagging the guys that we want. If a man doesn't have to put in any work with Ms. Communal Mattress in order to get the carnal satisfaction he desires, why would he put in the work with a woman he knows is trying to have something more than the physical? A lot of the times, he won't.
It's almost like she stalks the group looking for her next victim, because she has grown bored with the other five guys she has already sampled.
She's not hard to find either. More than likely she is flirting relentlessly with anything that has a penis or she is doing her best to keep the spotlight on her -- perhaps she feels the need to show all the gentlemen that she has amazing pole dancing skills.
Outwardly it appears that she is well-loved by every man in the group, and understandably so! They know that based on her previous performances, she will be pleasing the peen of one of the group members before the night is out.
And in her mind, she is the perfect guy's girl. She likes to have sex with no strings attached and she couldn't possibly be doing anything wrong because she knows all the guys she hooks up with.
But the sad truth is, she is lying to herself.
She neglects to see that no one takes her seriously and, worse yet, no one respects her.
Regardless of whether they want to admit it, guys gossip -- and sometimes they are worse than females, especially if the topic at hand is who's doing whom. So it goes without saying that if she slept with Tommy last weekend and Dan the next, the two will compare notes. And there is a good chance that those notes will be shared with the other men in their circle. This automatically causes the rest of the group to either become interested in sleeping with her or adding her to their not-to-do list for one simple reason -- she has been labeled as a communal mattress.
Not only does she lose the respect of the men, but the ladies aren't too fond of her either.
To females, a woman with a free vagina is a threat. She makes things harder for those of us who aren't trying to make a public mockery of ourselves and miss out on snagging the guys that we want. If a man doesn't have to put in any work with Ms. Communal Mattress in order to get the carnal satisfaction he desires, why would he put in the work with a woman he knows is trying to have something more than the physical? A lot of the times, he won't.
Viewing Comments 1 - 10 of 23
To Miss Stockton
posted 9/17/09 @ 12:51 AM EST
I really like your informative articles on relationships/sex. But, if I may, would like to ask you, if it is necessary to include the last line "Remember, "Easy U" is not as easy as you think," all the time. (Continued…)
Relevance?
posted 9/17/09 @ 1:54 AM EST
What...what even was the point of that opinion article? That was terrible.
First off, you didn't present anything people don't already know about your shamelessly derogatory term, "sluts". (Continued…)
Victoria
posted 9/17/09 @ 2:09 AM EST
I get that you're trying to open women's eyes to the fact that sleeping around isn't ideal, but I thought this column was going to be a little bit more risque, and not so much preachy. (Continued…)
Staci
posted 9/17/09 @ 7:08 AM EST
This article was so sad to me. As an alumni of ECU and coming back as a graduate student, it was horrible to hear the way some of our students were referred to. (Continued…)
ECU Alumni from 2007
posted 9/17/09 @ 8:16 AM EST
I wrote for the TEC for two years when I went to ECU. Its obvious the quality of articles and writing have gone down hill. Not to seem redundant from the previous posts but what was the point in this article? As an opinion columnist, I would hope that if the writer believes there are a large percentage of girls who fit into the category she illustrates, that perhaps talking about ways to deter this behavior would be more effective than droning on about stereotypes. (Continued…)
just_an_airman
Albert
posted 9/17/09 @ 12:22 PM EST
Regardless of the content of this article , it needed to be said! I think you expressed this opinion in the most tasteful way it could possibly have been said. (Continued…)
I love it!
posted 9/17/09 @ 8:49 PM EST
I love these articles, they're hilarious! It's a refreshing change. The pirate rants use to be my favorite section, the thing I would flip to first when I picked up a paper, but now I have a tie. (Continued…)
student/reader
posted 9/17/09 @ 9:29 PM EST
I think the article is boring. The intro article made it sound like it was going to be this fun, risque, sexy column, but it's really just depressing. (Continued…)
sexandthecitygirl
posted 9/17/09 @ 10:48 PM EST
So...I was expecting this column to read more like a column from Sex and the City. I think that this is a great column to have in TEC and I applaud the writer for their valiant efforts: but I just want to read a blow job article or a relationship article. (Continued…)
Please.
posted 9/18/09 @ 6:53 PM EST
Seriously?
Way to go TEC and ECU for allowing the double standard to continue, and for condoning pushing your own morals onto someone else.
Though I don't condone sexual promiscuity I don't push my own agenda on others. (Continued…)
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